I dont know how I ended up in my current profession.
I hate routine. I do not know how to do things at a certain time, over and over again. I like my stuff to be a unpredictable and untidy.
When I promised to deliver a story for you guys weekly, I completely forgot that I could not add another routine to my list of over flowing routines, so I apologise.
I will work hard, ( hand on chest) as from now on to try and deliver a story every two weeks...no pressure whatsoever.
That aside, I did something I had always said I would do, but never thought I would do.
I cut off all my hair.
It is called the big chop.
It was the barber's fault.
I had begged him to make me look nice, and with a menacing glint in his eyes, he'd nodded and fluttered that cloth thing over my shoulder. Spinning me around so quickly I almost fell dizzy, he set at destroying my feminity with his clippers.
Five minutes later, he spun me around again to face the mirror. I froze. What stared back at me was not what I had dreamt off. I thought I would look like halle Berry meet Jada Pinkett Smith.
I look like Mike Tyson meet "boys follow me".
Still, I smiled at him, patted my non existent hair with shaky hands and lied, " I like it."
The barber was overjoyed. He grinned and smacked his lips. " I tol' you e go fit you!... Seven Pounds pls!"
As I collected my three pound change from him, I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat.
When I got home, Chinese eyes took one good look at me and said.." It will grow abi?"
That was when it hit me. I am not as cute as I thought. I had always had the notion that any hairstyle will fit me. Dont blame me, blame those friggin toasters from way back.
Anyway, it has been two weeks now. My hair has only grown back by half of half of an inch. What happened to the promises of growth splurts once you chopped off your hair? ARRRRHH!! To worsen matters, I realised the barber literally shaved the front of my hair... so the front is almost bald, while the back has tufts of coily african hair.
Hope is not lost anyway.
I saw a girl rocking a super cute 'fro hawk to church the other day.
I shall do my hair like that one day.
When it grows.
Maybe in five years time.
How are you's?
D scribe, no vex, I am working on the story right now.
P.S: any one know where Idemili went?