1.3.07

A message from BimbyLads...

First of all, I would just like to Thank God, the Mighty One, Jehovah Jireh, Jehova Nissi.. the I AM.. for his mercies, and his goodness over my life.. I am truly a living testimony that there is a GOD and that God cares for us.. so if you have any doubt in your heart, please, just consult me and Ill lay my life on the table for you to see that God is Real.. and He is Powerful… Ill tell my full testimony one day….

So today o.. I decided to send messages to a few people that I encountered over the past few days.. if i was slighly bigger and had small muskles, i would have told u masef.. but as i am breakable.. i decided to express my feelings on paper..

DISCLAIMER: if one of the messages relates to you.. no vex ok.. na with love I dey write am..

I proceed:

1)Dear Chinco Food Assistant @ the Chinese restaurant by Barking Roundabout,

No blame me say I dey stuff my bowl with plenty food.. Na ‘eat as much as u like’ u call am.. First of all, u give me small anchor butter bowl make I pour my food inside.if i give ur pikin that kin bowl,u will rain chinese epe on me...
to add insult upon injury..u come dey eye me as I dey pack the rice.. TAKE YA TIME O!! ehen.. infact.. I will not collect that ya nonsense bowl again .. I will bring my own nylon bag when next I am coming to buy my ‘eat as much as you like’…
hiss... Hong Si Fire Choi to u too ( no be so calabar girl??).. chan chan kook..


2)Dear Aunty Nija on the 17.46 eastbound central line train on Monday,

Kai.. stop that nonsense u have on your eye brow,… as in Waaarraa Heeeeeeeell?? PURPLE and WINE eyebrows??? Ehn.. I know u like to-match, me too I like to-match,.. but u really mezzed things up there.. and why on earth where ur eyebrows pointing to the sky?? Ur being watched by Me.. if I catch you in public with those kind of eyebrows again.. ill personally tattoo eyebrows on your face..

I know u are aunty naija becos of the purple 'expressions' rock on ur head... u call that thing hair?? I fit bet with u say if i carry spade dey begin dig that thing.. for sure , for sure.. i go strike oyel (oil)... u no wan bet?.. na u sabi...

3)Dear Couple devouring each other on the 9.15 central line train westbound this morning,:

…Stop CHOPPING LIPS in front of the whole world.. its disgusting... Cant u wait till u get home?? Ehn.. hissssssssss.. Every oppressor shall be oppressed- wey my chinese eyes?


4)Dear Skinny Teenager that bounced into JUDIYA Enterprises Corner shop in Barking on Wednesday evening,

Its not leehu Ribena.. its LITTLE ..T for Tango.. T for Transport , T for Tolagbe. Also for Tutu.. If I hear u say LIHU again.. ill deal with u severely…. U nonsense breeeish init chudrens…..E ma se bii eni ti won sa si.. hisss

Sha I was at client site yesterday.. and OT will never cease to amaze me.. he actually invited me to the Hilton hotel to come and swim becos thier swimming pool is visible thru the reception floor..he siad i should come ...One day when ‘I am less busy’
... ngbati iya swimming pool o je mi? ( trans.. when i am not suffering from lack of swimming pool!!)

OT.. Bimbylads shall never be less busy… shogbo??. in fact.. That reminds me.. did anyone watch Channel 5 documentary 2 days ago? ‘ The Boston Murder Strangler?’…. as MR Oke used to say back then to us in Jss 2.. ‘HAY word is HENUFF for the wise…. The matching song while u go to your class …

.…OT.. OT…OT.. u no sabi werin dey.... u never jam fire..there is norin u can doo.. for I am covered by the blood of Jesus.. oo oooo.. no body can haaaaaarmmmm. meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.. una no go sing along?

Meanwhile, I am seriously thinking that Chinese eyes is a MFFF ( Man- Friend For FOOD) … each time I cook for him.. he begins to bless me with all the blessings of Abraham ,Issac and Jacob…. Ehn.. all this becos of Rice and Obe elepo?? I confirmed my suspicions to him this Morning when he dropped me at the station and he replied with a wet smooch.. …. I kuku told him I will report him to my blogville.. Which I have..(Satisfied Smile).


Okay, eyin hounders, i have updated..all be it a short post.. im hoff to liverpool street to buy some goodies..

take kia..

P.s: a goodie for the first person to comment.. and its not bournvita and peppersoup... its BIMBYLADS HOUSE SPECIAL OBE ELEPO RICE..

23 comments:

bimbylads said...

FIRSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

LondonBuki said...

You berra gerrout! I am first!

Nonsense!

bimbylads said...

no ya NOT!! no ya NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!

LondonBuki said...

You are too funny!

So you want to reward yourself with the rice and obe elepo? You this BimbyLads chick sef!

You better organise how you are going to get my prize to me oh... I am going to be on the east and westbound central line, over the weekend, so you can wait for me on the platform to give me!

My cousin said to me,"Mr Scoh gave me a certificoh"... yup Mr Scott, certificate! Nonsense! I don't know why they talk like that... shio!

You are hilarious! Please you and Chinese Eyes should not devour each others faces near me, you have been warned!

londonnaijachic said...

You are crazy.My co workers are wondering if am all right after crying from laughter.what is wrong with PDA?Me i like public display of affection oh! Lol @ the naija woman with the ayamatanga hair. What is that?
All naija men love food.

bimbylads said...

@LB: lol @ certifcoh.. lmao..!! ur nuts..but why do they speak like that? dont worry, me and chineze eyes will respek u..
ur obe is in the fringe.. ill warm it and email it to u this evening.. or bera still. .. platform 17,. central line. init!

@LNC: i kuku know that niaja men love food o.. but chineze eyes and the prayers.. lol.. its soo amazingg.. one spoon of rice.. prayer galore... he says its unconcious...lolll
PDA: to a certain extent.. u shud have seen this couple.. i was almost certain that the woman would soon find herself in the man's stomach with the way they were going.. hissssss.

Blessed Child said...

bimby lads haaaaa!!!O cheat o!!O cheat gan ni!!How u go be first??STOP JO!!!

low said...

Bimbylads!...Where did i go wrong??????? i thot us looking alike meant somehow i even rubbed some of my sane xteristics on u..BUT NO!!!!!!!!!! O TI GOES!!!! (U HAVE ....GOEESSS!!!!)..LOLLL

LEEEHUU ABI..LOLLL

bimbylads said...

@ blessed child: lemme alone o!! ehen.. i was FORST.. blogger does not lie...
@Low: ( in a still small voice).. 'i am sane.. sane i am'.. lol.. i have goess o.. lollllllllllllllll...

My Heart said...

Bimbylads oo ni pa mi oo. I can't even laugh the kain laugh i suppose. Nitori ishe. I absolutely love your blog. Yeah not a fan of PDA at all.

Daddy's Girl said...

LOL!! You're hilarious!!

confusednaijagirl said...

omo yin, a lati gba adura fun e. you need serious help!!
they wil thinkI am crazy at work now!

Simply Gorgeous said...

Bimbylads I purposely did not come in first, to avoid you cooking for me and me having to be rushed to have my stomach pumped.

You are truly a madwoman! How can you be first on your own site, just when I thought I saw everything.


Why are you hating on people that are sucking face. I am sure you and OT and Chinese Eyez do it all the time. (smile)

You know I love you right?

Favoured Girl said...

This girl you are too funny! Don't hate on the fashionable aunty on the train now, that's how she likes to be seen in public. I hate oversabi PDA too, it's just annoying!
By the way, how can you be first on your own post now? You've already removed the chance of anybody winning the 'prize' now. Not fair....
Did anybody not tell you that the way to a man's heart is his stomach? Me, I've learnt first-hand o. Keep cooking for Chinese Eyes and he will continue to bless you! LOL!

bibi said...

lol..lol.. lol

law_damsel said...

ooo serious...dat i can help pple confirm

bhookey84 said...

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO i swear ure a tripppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp

exschoolnerd said...

craze girl..ur blog always seems to brighten up my day..u always have a new entry every time i pop in..omo u have time oh!!!!!

lol at ur aunty with the wine eyebrows..

Dimples said...

Mo dara Abimbola please now…haba Mr Oke will not be happy to know that u are still as crazy as ever….

Ma worry jare I support u on the Chinese buffet move…why put the sign up if ur going to be eyeing up every body that comes to it…”get my money’s worth is what I say every time I go buffet eating.

I aint even going to talk about that your Aunty..because perhaps we see people like that all the time.

PDA men!!!..with age people should really chill on that stuves….Chinese Eyes na u get your thing…chop am to your heart satisfaction.

LOL…Mr Oke and those his phonetics men…he put that Oral English woman to shame.

Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) said...

Counterfeit Bimby u're a goner o. Kilode gan sef? U're tooooooo funny madam. So one spoon na blessings chineze eyes go shower u with, that's good o. "Wet smooch" abi and u';re complaining about the PDA lip chewing folks. Enjoy ur weekend.

DiAmOnD hawk said...

oh my goodness you're tooooooooo funny....

what kind of nonsense is this...YOU are first...yeye

im not so into that PDA thing either...holding hands...little kiss...but DEVOURING yourselves in public? a definite NO NO

LondonBuki said...

Ki lo n se iwo omo Bimby Lads yii???

Can you update??? It's been 4 days!!! FOUR whole days!!!!

If I come back and see this post again, you will see PEPPER!!!

Calabar Gal said...

Hong Si Fai Cai to you too!! LOL!!! Hilarious Post. I love those eat as much as you like restauarants with a passion too but with this no carbs diet, I'm restricted to eating only brocolli each time.