14.5.10

The New Bimby's Book Series. Chapter One

Welcome to Bimby's Book series 2. 
To read the story in full screen, kindly click on Full screen. To zoom in so the text can be larger, click on the + sign below the document.

And finally, please leave a comment, let me know your thoughts. It is what spurs me on.
xxx
Bimbylads

 
 Adunni

Ilu Epo. South West Nigeria.


25 comments:

pawpawandmango said...

I am soooo glad I found your blog! I first visited was a week ago and I was mad at you. Because you robbed me of 2 hours of my time and made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes. I kept dragging hubby to read "just one more"
I am loving this story that shamelessly exposes your talent! I hereby request my autographed copy, when will you be going to print? God bless!

Myne Whitman said...

Wow, this is great! I was sucked in from the first sentence to the last. Will look forward to the coming ones.

Comments

There was a confusion in the voice. African angel Vs join our ancestors. I will wait for some back story to know where she heard of soft carpets and water from holes in the wall. Did she live away from her parents for a while perhaps?

Ghanaija said...

hey hun you are doing it again i am hooked!! How r u and mini bim and chinese eyes miss you loads. please send pics of mini bim to my email.
looking forward to reading more.xoxo

YankeeNaija said...

My God Bim. Oh my God. You are truly blessed with an amazing talent/gift. I aspire to be you. God bless you.

ibilola said...

Yay!!!! Brillant as always!!!!
Me want mooooorrrrreeeeeee!!!!!

BiMbyLaDs** said...

@ pawpawandmango: what a unique name u have! lol. thanks a lot and God bless

@Myne: thanks! yes pls, keep reading and thanks for the comment.
@GhanaNaija: is that u Z? miss u loads. Ill look for a recent pic and send u once I am sure its u! lol
@YankeeN: ha ha! im bluzhing gaan!
Thank God.

@ibilola: lol.. u and your YAY!! lol..

as always thanx for reading.

B

Ghanaija said...

Hey hun yes its Zee indeed, now how i wish all i needed to see u was to get on a train t barking but im so far away. love you lots

Soniya said...

I don't really enjoy your use of simile in writing. E.g., when you said "...as if someone had smeared a blurb of some latex from the bark of an Iroko tree on my eyelids."

Or when you said "...her once beautiful face, often likened to that of an African angel, looked like a mashed bean cake..."

I think the use of similes should be short and straight-forward not convoluted; like you're trying too hard. It takes me out of your story into something else when I'm trying to focus on your story!

This story captivated me enough to care. And I'm a critic not a hater. Thank you.

temmy tayo said...

Mama Mini Bim, may your God given inspiration never dry!

BiMbyLaDs** said...

@ Soniya: lol.. i read back and thought:'hmm.. isnt it a bit too much?' lol.. but by then i was too tired to rewrite. So, thanks for critique. I appreciate, and take on board for future chapters.
@ Temmytayo: how are u dearie? and the miniTem? lol.. hope alls well. Amen to your prayers o. With a hubby and a child, I need the prayers.

TiTi said...

Welcome back Bimby. In true Bimbylads style you have lured us into another nailbiting series.

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Bimbylads is back, doing what she does best.

All I can say is that I enjoyed this first chapter and want the rest. Hoping all is well with you and yours.

Anonymous said...

Loved the story Bimbylads! Waiting patiently for parts 2...Well done xxx

Tinu said...

AWESOME!!!! WELCOME BACK

Tinu said...

AWESOME!!!! WELCOME BACK

BiMbyLaDs** said...

thank u so much guys. I appreciate ur comments. Trust me, with Minibim struggling with me to type, its a feat! lol..

Anyaposh said...

that was good stuff! i want more :)

winneR said...

Yay!!u r back.
Trust all's good with Chineseyes & mini u?
I TOTALLY shuddered at d graphic descriptions of beatings,pain...rili bad goosebumps,always makes me wonder how some women can live with it.God Forbid!!!!
I cant stand 4 dat...NO...NEVER!!!

Justjoxy said...

Very gripping. Can't wait to read the next instalment. Lol at Minibim struggling to type, I can totally relate. Well done girl.

dScR?Be said...

OMG!!!!! I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Glad ur back!!!

BETTER THAN EVER! wow... sth just told me 2 check ur blog 2day! ur an EXCELLENT writer plEAASEEE keep it coming!

sub-conscious said...

wow... i love!!!

Anonymous said...

........Love the "scribd"concept..thumps up!

Maid of Heart said...

Great hook! Draws me into the story.

I'm wondering though why she asked the question what secrets her family held yet subtle tells us she had siblings who had died.

Overuse of descriptive terms,similes and adverbs. A few typos here and there. Long almost windy sentences but a powerfully written story.

Great ending too. Love to read more.

BiMbyLaDs** said...

thanks Maid of Heart, great blog u have as well. Noted all ur comments, a fresh feedback from a critical eye is always appreciated. A writer can never see his own fault really!

Jaycee said...

Bimbylads, one thing I want to say is that you will be a very successful author. The introduction to the book (Adunni's story) is so captivating and makes me want to devour the entire book all at one go.

I just subscribed to you on Scribd. Now reading the rest of the chapters.